Male Karens

Image courtesy of Patrick Walts

We have the “Karen” meme, a logical extrapolation of the “Can I speak to your manager?” woman. And yes, it’s always a woman, and is always white. I suppose we’d need a culturally appropriate name for a similar type of black woman and Hispanic woman–because black and Hispanic Karens exist, believe me–but we’re rolling with “Karen” for now because it’s perfect, albeit unfair to women named Karen.

But the question always remained: What is the nickname for a male Karen? Thanks to this story, I think now we know thanks TL this story from Oklahoma City. We shall call him Stewart.

OKLAHOMA CITY — His name stitched on his uniform shirt didn’t help. Neither did his employer’s name on his delivery truck.

Travis Miller, a furniture and appliance delivery driver making a run Monday through a gated Oklahoma City neighborhood, was held up for more than a half-hour by two white men who blocked his truck with a car and demanded to know why he was there, NBC News reported.

Miller is black.

Was race an issue here? Was it not? I don’t know. But the fact that this (a) is a gated community and (b) only those with a passcode can enter makes one not unreasonably assume that race was a factor here.

I don’t know how gated communities work, but drivers drivers would have to be able to enter, right?

Miller, 42, explained to NBC News that the customer to whom he and a co-worker were delivering had given him the code to get through the gate of the Ashford Hills neighborhood. They made their delivery and were leaving the property when their truck was blocked in by a white Subaru.

The Subaru’s driver, who identified himself as David Stewart, demanded to know why the men were there. NBC News and other media outlets that have reached out to Stewart have been unsuccessful. LaShawn Miller wrote on Facebook that both he and his wife have deleted their social media profiles since Monday’s confrontation.

Stewart, who she dubbed “Gate Code Greg,” also called J.B. Hunt and demanded that her husband destroy the video, she wrote.

“Gate Code Greg” is pretty good, but I like Stewart better.

So this David Stewart guy–not to be confused with my friend, the excellent David V. Stewart–hails from a town called Edmond. Friend of the blog Patrick Walts is very familiar with this town and explained the following to me:

This context helps us determine why the Karen meme resonates: because we all know this busy body who thinks they own the place and are entitled to do whatever they want to whomever they want by virtue of being . . . something.

Is it racial? Is it political? Is it socio-economic? Is it how they were raised? I don’t care. All I knew is that some people are grade-A jerks and think they’re entitled to everything. They come in all shapes and sizes, and all (two) sexes and races. Who’re people are just the easiest target of this because–I guess–we do this most often, although my personal experience is that it’s equally distributed across the races.

I consider the Karen phenomenon an American thing and not a racial thing.

We’re living in an era of unprecedented wealth, convenience, and softness. We’re told time and again that nothing is our fault and that some other jerk is responsible for our woes. This goes to many people’s heads: the affluent think they’re better than all the other mere peons, and the less-affluent think they’re better because they’re somehow being oppressed by those with more than them.

And humility is most definitely not an American virtue.

Speaking of Stewarts names David, the good David Stewart (the one with the V) recently wrote a very good post about Karens in the cultural sphere.

At the end of the day, no matter the context, a Karen, male or female, is the kind of person who sees the world only through one perspective: THEIRS.

Karens are narcissistic, situational sociopaths. And they’re everywhere. Including, presumably, Edmond, Oklahoma.

(Yes, the Karen meme is racist and sexist. I suppose that’s why it’s so funny.)


No Karens in my books. Get some new perspective and buy them here!

25 comments

  1. “At the end of the day, no matter the context, a Karen, male or female, is the kind of person who sees the world only through one perspective: THEIRS.”

    Said every teenager ever.

    Gated communities have gates for a reason, so what was this neighborhood’s policy on sharing gate codes with vendors?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Don’t know the policy, but I’m not buying that as an excuse for blocking the delivery truck. It doesn’t take a huge leap of logic to assume that a delivery was being made to someone in the community. Presumably, other delivery drivers have come and gone into and out of Ashford Hills without incident. Does every single delivery have to be run through this guy? Maybe but I doubt it.

      I also disagree that my statement is adolescent in any way. Someone DEMANDING something without any explanation as to why, is unreasonable. If this guy really had the right and the power to control who goes in our out of the community, or controlled the policy. he could’ve said so instead of just saying “I own one-eighteenth of this.”

      These were not the actions of a mature grown man.

      Liked by 1 person

      • “David Stewart was a jerk, which means that the delivery driver was supposed to have the code. I can’t tell you whether or not this gated community had a list of trusted vendors, a cycling temporary code, or a mandate that residents were supposed to escort vendors, but David Stewart! Male Karen bad! Presumptions!”

        A male Karen isn’t a Stewart. He’s an Orlov Trotter named “Hans,” and his hooves won’t stop him from blocking your deliveryman with his Subaru.

        Like

      • If you disagree with me or think I’m wrong, fine. Don’t be a snarky asshole about it. We have a rapport here which is why I was civil about it earlier. If you disagree or think I’m wrong tell me like an adult and not like we’re on Internet blood sports or some stupid shit like that. Otherwise I’m not going to engage.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Alexander

      This happens in Singapore with chines or Indian security guards. Here’s a story one of my ex colleagues was sent a condo (gated with security guards) to give a language lesson. My colleague is Indian origin but is dark skinned.
      The security guard refused him entry because he didn’t believe he was a teacher. It took a phone call to the president (Japanese) to finally sort things out.

      Kisha/Leticia is the black Karen equivalent.
      Marisol or Maripili (Maria Piliar) for the Hispanic Karens

      xavier

      Liked by 1 person

      • Alexander,

        Don’t get me started. The term institutional racism abused here in North America is both apt and real in Singapore.

        The PM there stated the reason the country hasn’t had a non-Chinese PM is because the elderly Chinese voters won’t accept one.

        News to those voters and deeply affronted all Singaporeans.

        In any case, males Karens= gammas/omegas ’nuff said.

        Others have chosen Mark in honour of Mark Cuban (the NBA owner) who tweeted for people to snitch on those who broke the confinement orders so he could denounce them to the authorities.

        Male Karens can also go by wannbe secret kings ’cause they’re that pathetic

        Gated communities aren’t Stepford wives dystopias; they’re the Days of lives of guiding Karens, gammas and secret king snitches cringy reality TV shows.

        xavier

        .

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Once again I can’t help but feel that Karens are a symtom of our cultural atomization. They’re the bossy knitting ladies from the times of yore, but try to push around people who have no relationship with them. You can’t be the matriarch of strangers that you have no empathy for and who can’t talk to your husband about your behavior.
    Stewarts take everything in bad faith – everyone is being a jerk, intentionally. I run into these people all the time. “This waiter doesn’t like me because I’m white! That’ why our food is late!” They never think that the waiter is doing his best, or that the kitchen might be understaffed. It’s always somebody acting with evil intent.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Nailed it. They do indeed think everyone else is being a jerk intentionally. Very appropriate you brought up restaurants. Ive worked in food service. These types of people—Karens I suppose, even though I am already growing sick of the term—view the world through an intensely selfish prism. It’s maddening, and its everywhere. I don’t think its a racial thing; like I said in the post, I think it’s cultural. What that says about our current culture is not pretty.

      Like

  3. In high school and college, I had a summer job working for a family owned nursery and greenhouse business. It was one of the best jobs I have ever worked, but that’s beside the point. Once I was old enough, the owner let me join the landscaping crews.

    We would regularly get stopped and harassed while working! There were nosy Karens and Stewart’s who believed we were up to no good even as we shoveled wheelbarrows full of soil and mulch and planted trees. We were obviously working: we were The Help. Didn’t matter. Some of the richer communities, gated and otherwise, are filled with some of the biggest a-holes you’ll ever meet.

    Some of the nicest people too!

    When 9/11 happened, 5 of us were installing an entire high end landscape (it was two months of work for the 5 of us): 2 acres of new lawn, sprinkler system, +150 trees and shrubs, ponds and an extensive series of dry stack stone walls. The home owner who was extremely wealthy (at the time, her husband was an SVP at a Fortune 500) invited us all in to watch what was happening. She fed us and treated us like family (we were an hour from our HQ) and we sat there all day in stunned disbelief. She didn’t want us working and missing it. She was a very kind and classy lady.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Good stories, and you make a very important point: this phenomenon isn’t a wealth thing either. There are middle-class and poor Karens and rich people who are awesome. I contend that the entitlement mentality is an American cultural thing, not a race or wealth thing.

      It’s also a “class” thing in the “personal class” sense.

      Thank you for the excellent reminder!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Alexander

        Quick update

        The Michigan attorney general iust became Karen in chief. She literally had a temper tantrum becuase Trump didn’t wear a mask at the Ford plant.
        But instead of taking on the president she’s going after Ford.

        Wow all that’s missing is a slap on the facecand the patronizingly sociopathic this hurts me more than you speech

        xavier

        Liked by 1 person

  4. My parents just got interrogated and cursed at by a Stewart. Interesting it was while they were working (seems to be part of the these), they do auto transport and were loading cars in a lot that was apparently private though adjacent to public lot. This man pulled up and demanded to know why they were there and then called the police on them…
    The police said to him, “they’re working, I know why they are here. Can you tell me why YOU are here?” He then left and hollered at the managers from the car dealership (who hired my parents)…

    Liked by 1 person

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